No answers but more questions.

And we have been given the ALL CLEAR with the blood tests, which in itself is GREAT news!

But (isn't there always one of them?) it does mean that Becky has to see the Dr again, this time on Monday morning at 10am.

Obviously i am ok delighted she got clear results..

...but a little niggle is in the back of my tiny, overactive mind now, what is making her lose 28lb in two weeks? She is eating well and healthily, still feels yukky after eating, but does want to eat. Still looks so tired at the end of the day and still only weighs in at a tiny 6 stone which is not near enough for her height of 1.55 metre!

Of course part of me thinks I'm worrying too much.. she'll be fine (won't she?). Part of me wants to give her chocolate, full fat drinks and lard a healthy balanced diet for every meal of the day. Part of me thinks I'm being over protective and should maybe let it go.
Am i worrying unnecessarily about her?

I think i mostly want a tangible answer to it all. Something i can try to understand, to deal with, and because i am her Mum, something i can make better.
I am scared I'm going to be told "We don't know why she is like this, but we will keep an eye on her" or "It's just the way she is."
She does not like feeling like this or being so tired and i do not like seeing her like this.

Patient, unwillingly.

“God's way of answering the Christian's prayer for more patience, experience, hope and love often is to put him into the furnace of affliction”

Richard Cecil quote

So results day is in...I knew the doctor would be busy first thing so we set to tidying a little in the living room and not going near the phone. At 10am I phoned for her results to be told by the machine that results are given out from 2pm! Honestly do these people NOT understand that i am not a patient lady, that i want to know NOW, that i tossed and turned a lot the past few nights and am tired and irritable, but mostly i want to help my baby and can't because i do not know what's wrong with her and wont be able to find out till this afternoon?
So i have had patience thrust upon me! I am aware that patience is a virtue but i have plenty other virtues and patience was never top on my list of priorities. Especially when it comes to my children.
Richards Mum and step Dad are coming for a visit today too. They are taking us out to lunch, which right now is probably the best thing for all of us, but mostly me! I hope Becky will be able to eat at least some of her meal, I also hope i do not seem too pre-occupied. But mostly i hope that when i call at 2pm on the dot we get the answers we really wish for, even if i have no idea what a good answer will be. I am sure its not BAD bad news because if it was they would have phoned up before now. Wouldn't they?

Is there anything you aren't good at? Patience? Forgiveness? anything at all? Can anyone out there relate to this?

I think i'm gonna like it..

at my new place of work! I start on the 11th March and after spending the morning there today i can honestly say i am looking forward to it very much. It is not as fast paced as my current day, meaning the children spend more time being children and less time being shepherded from one thing to the next. There is more time to play with them doing the things they choose to do and not making them do things that you plan or expect them to do. aaaah, listen, that is the sound of me..relaxed!
I have enjoyed my current job, the kids have been great, and i will miss them and the parents greatly but i will not miss all the paperwork or paperwork for paperwork's sake! Where one sheet should do we are using 3 or 4 and it takes us away from time spent being with and education in a fun way. I guess the fun has been sucked out of it and when that happens it is definitely time to move on.
David spent the morning at the kids club today (run at my new place of work) and i was a little worried how he would get on as he is quite shy normally but he was swimming this morning and after that did a dance session and hockey. By the time i collected him he'd made friends and was having a blast! I am really pleased about this as he will be spending his mornings/days there during the holidays. And the wonderful things is that it is at no extra cost to me. WOW i am so lucky.
So that's me all happy and chilled now!
Hope your day goes as well as mine is today.

Happy Birthday to my lovely man!

Yes indeed it is Rich's **th birthday today!! (Even i am not daft enough to post his age which is a bit different from mine!).
Hope you have a great day off with the kids and I. We have opened presents and will be cake baking shortly!

But before our day even began Becky and I were at the doctors getting her bloods taken. She was so good! She laughed and smiled all the way through, was fascinated by the vials filling up! And bless her heart even managed to thank the nurse on the way out!! haha yup "Thanks for stabbing me in the arm and drawing my blood before i have even had breakfast!" Gotta love a pre teen with a sense of humour!
And guess what? Yep i was allowed to take my camera! So being the caring loving Mum i am i took the mickey out of her, laughed at and with her and kept her laughing while i took pics of this special moment we were sharing. And since we are sharing here you all go...(I'd hate to think you were left out in all this!)...

Going in..

Drawing the bloods (she found this amazing and funny!!)All over!

Results should be back for Thursday so i will be sure to keep you all posted.

Please keep Becky in your thoughts today.

Some of you are aware that Becky (the middley one) hasn't been too well since pre Christmas. I found out part of the cause and posted about it here. She hasn't really made any health improvements of late though. When on the medication she was "going" but was losing weight f.a.s.t
so the doctor stopped her meds to "as required". She has had it twice since then but still gets terrible stomach pains, loss of appetite even though she is really hungry ( like when you are pregnant and you really want to eat because it smells so good while it is cooking, but when it is in front of you, you just aren't hungry anymore!), going to the toilet, not going to the toilet. She has confided in me that she is frightened. Frightened of being like this, of what it might be that is causing her to be like this. She is really scared she may need to go into hospital, she doesn't know why she is scared, she just is. Since coming off the meds she has lost another stone in weight so now weighs 6.6 stone. Even my un-medically trained mind knows that not good. So this evening we are back to the doctor to see if there is anything more he can do. I will keep you posted as to how we get on.

On a brighter note, when the postman came today he bought a postcard from the school. Seems Rachel is not the only one trying her hardest :) Becky's science teacher was so pleased with her homework she wanted to share it with us :) Becky is delighted to have recieved a postcard and i am just so very proud of her :)
In case you are wondering the homework was to create a leaflet about an animal and how to look after it. She created her's as a leaflet on how to look after "her good self" titled...
"What to do with your Becky when you get it home!"
Apparently it was original, witty, informative and very well thought out!
****Update on Becky****

She has lost 2 stone in two weeks, she is a lot underweight and we are doing a fasting blood test in the morning. The doctor is checking for e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g he can in a blood test. Results should be back by the end of the week.