The right to know?

This is a tough one for me to write. I have a dear, dear friend who i think the absolute world of. She is my confidant, we laugh and talk, we've cried together but mostly we are happy in each others company, with those comfortable silences and with lots of chatter!(she wont see this as hates pc's!!)
She has a child who became a "lady" this year. Other than really heavy periods she is coping fine. But they are REALLY heavy. Horrendously so.
I suggested a trip to the Dr., as it is a really strong family trait. She said she had made an appointment, but will not take her child with her.
For once (and it is a really rare thing) I kept my mouth shut. It's her decision after all it's her child.
But if it were one of my girls what would i do? Of course it's simple for me (I do tend to see most of life in black and white with very very few grey areas), the child would come with me. After all, i'd be discussing the child and surely they have a right to know family history and how best to deal with it. Am i perhaps a bit to liberal? I really thought i am a conservative gal but i guess not! I feel i want to say something but don't want to seem like i'm being my opinionated self, or butting in. I'm sure my friend is trying to protect her child, but sometimes knowledge and understanding is the best defense? Am i way off base?
I know i will probably step back and let my friend do it her way. It's just..am i alone in thinking like this?

Oh dear Lord...it's the wrong kid!

*** Warning - period talk!!***

Well today one of the girls came down to tell me she thinks she has "started". And you guessed it, it was the younger one! She is 11 years old, 12 in October and her body has decided that now is as good a time as any to add to all the issues she already has..changing school, leaving junior school etc etc. I am sure she really didn't need this on top! But it's here, and i guess it's here to stay!
The older daughter was okay with this happening to her sister she's sensible enough to realise its out of all control. But her face dropped when Dad came home with roses for her sister. He bought them for her as her first bouquet as a "lady"..(and all the while i have been saying "it doesnt change you, you are still you and it is not that overnight you become a lady"!! haha)
So one is sad that it's not her getting flowers from Dad and the other is crying because she really doesn't want to be a lady!
We talked a lot previously about "it" happening and how we deal with it all. They are fine to come and ask me about things and worries but i never in a million expected it this soon or with the younger daughter first! I was a late starter and really hoped they would be too!
My heart breaks for my oldest as it has got to be really hard seeing your kid sis develop and start before you.
Has anyone else had this issue arise? Please advise as to how you dealt with it because i really feel stuck between a rock and a hard place!
(Next time round i'm coming back as the Daddy!!)